sowing my overnight oats

christ, that’s a revolting image!

Weigh in post coming tomorrow because my photoshop isn’t working for some reason and I can’t make a banner, but because I’m all about the bass style I want to do it properly. I was going to have a night off tonight but Paul, being a darling husband, has just nipped to ASDA to get me some milk and to make me a hot chocolate, so, I feel I should return the goodwill by posting a quick recipe on here. Remember: this post was never meant to be, hence being short! It’s overnight oats time!

how to make overnight oats:

overnight

Put simply – measure out the oats, place in the bottom of the jar, top up with yoghurt and then lots of syn free berries. The oats absorb the yoghurt and the fruit juices and creates a lovely little porridge. You can mix it up with other fruits and yoghurt, just make sure you’re choosing syn-free options or synning accordingly!

Handy thing to make before bed to save time in the morning.

One last thing – Paul actually farted me awake last night. How classy is that – it wasn’t the pitch or volume, just the sheer overwhelming stench. He’s the only one who can take a fragrant thai green curry and make it smell like a cat shit drying in the sun.

Isn’t life a joy…

70 mullerlight yoghurts

now, since I was working overtime yesterday, I sent Paul to the shops to ‘stock up the fridge’. This is what he came back with.

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That’s seventy yoghurts. Well no, you can’t see 70, but the bloody salad drawer, drinks shelf and egg shelf are also full of yoghurts. Great work! Still, it gave me an idea, so I fired off a letter to Muller, as seen below:

lettermuller

Haha! Muller yoghurts are perfect for a free or a low-syn snack, and even better, if you stick them in the freezer, it’ll take you an age to eat them and you get an ‘ice-cream’ feeling. Don’t get me wrong, compared to eating dulce de leche Häagen-Dazs, it’s like switching from Andrex to Izal, but if it scratches that itch…

Be careful though – the Muller Rice and Muller Corner yoghurts are full of syns. You’re looking for lights and lights only. Rule of thumb is if it has cheesecake bits, it’ll add an extra syn or so, but most of the ‘plain’ fruit flavours are good to go. A sprinkling of chocolate doesn’t equal a syn!

Enjoy. Weigh-in chat tomorrow and a new recipe card (I’ve made two tonight!)

J

slimming world fried breakfast

it’s the weekend, so only a quick post from me today as I have a busy day of watching UK Border Force on Sky Atlantic and giving the puppy-dog-eyes to Paul so he’ll bring me a frozen Mullerlight, load the washing, unload the washing, peg out the washing…you get the idea. Pegging in our house means nothing more than a chore.

Today’s breakfast, which was actually lunch because we got out of bed after noon like the somnolent slatterns that we are, was a one syn fry-up.

Halftone

I’m not entirely sure why Paul cooked the bacon until it resembled the skin on a burnt scrotal sack, but hey ho. It’s all fairly self-explanatory, so I’ll not bother with the recipe, but:

to make a slimming world fried breakfast:

warning: make sure your sausages are low-syn or free. Quorn low-fat sausages are syn free, others well, google is your friend but always choose the low-fat versions and work backwards from there. Your eggs can be scrambled (watch your milk allowance if you add your milk, only add cream if you’re insane, poached (syn-free) or friend (syn-free if you use frylight). Tomatoes and mushrooms all syn free of course.

second warning: don’t bother trying to actifry a weight-watchers sausage. Firstly, they taste bloody awful, and second, it’ll end up really breaking down in your actifry, and looking a bit like this. Bleurgh.

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Oh delicious!