Bacon and tomato rigatoni – it’s a quick meal to throw together with the added bonus of some aubergine in there so you can ‘get your speed’ and all that pap. Full confession: this is inspired by a Hello Fresh meal we had. We’re trying out Hello Fresh whilst we’re stuck at Chubby Towers Adjacent because there’s not much of a kitchen here and it was getting to the point where we were on first name terms with the entire roster of the Just Eat delivery drivers. It sounds amazing eating takeaway every day but once Paul’s lips had turned blue from the effort of shaking the drips off after a piss, we needed to change. We aren’t being paid by Hello Fresh – indeed, somehow, Paul managed to be the only person in the entire world to pay full price for his first box – but we will keep you informed as to how we go. So far, so good! Don’t you fret, though, the meals on here will always be Slimming World friendly, and this bacon and tomato rigatoni is a good example of that! Take a look:
Oh, and this bacon and tomato rigatoni is excellent for lunches!
Anyway. How are you all coping with the kids being at home during these difficult times? Because, frankly, it must be bloody awful for you. I have made no secret on here that I am terrible with children. They can’t tell good jokes, they’re rubbish at fetching things and they command your attention all the time. I’ve already got myself for that. Babies get angry and poo all the time (and seem destined to get troubling maladies like cradle cap – a friend of mine had a baby recently and I genuinely thought she had popped out a giant rice crispie), toddlers bump into things and shout, children need clothes and feeding and teenagers – from my own experience – are whirlwinds of emotions and Lynx Africa. Nope.
The reason I mention children is that I overheard an absolute belter this morning. A very prim and proper looking family (you know the type surely, Dad will be an accountant in a failing regional firm, mum will spend her evening writing lengthy diatribes about perceived supermarket injustices on Mumsnet) were in front of me when I went to collect breakfast. There was ever so much noise as you’d expect with two children in tow, with the youngest shouting Mummy over and over again and being largely ignored save by me who tutted and made a show of turning up the volume on my earbuds*. This went on for at least five hateful minutes before he shouted MUUUUUUMMY one last time and then loudly declared that he ‘needed a big shit’. Well: they are looked mortified and I had to feign a good old corona-cough into my elbow to mask my laughter. If I had a child, that’s the kind of kid I want.
* nothing makes me feel older and in the way than trying to change songs on my Samsung Earbuds. You have to tap three times to move back a song, and double tap to move forward. I just can’t get the hang of the tapping, and as a result I’m left walking down the street swearing furiously to myself whilst tap-tap-tapping at my ears like a fucking woodpecker. Honestly, I long for the days of my JAMP3 player where I had to agonise over which twelve Limp Bizkit songs to put on it and then cut about town holding what looked like a radon detector in my hands.
Children is something that will never happen, though. Can you imagine the resulting mess that would come about from Paul and I blurting into a test-tube together and getting it fertilised? If we were lucky we’d end up with a child who inherited my humour and height together with Paul’s fabulous eyebrows and exhaustive intellect but readers, we’re not lucky. The little bugger would get my “designed by Frank Gehry” nose, Paul’s pig-trotter feet, my total irrationality and some bizarre combination of the very worst of all our features. In short, our child would look like a badly-faxed photo of Ann Widdecombe, and that’s something this world doesn’t need.
I’ll concede on one aspect of having children around that I would like: taking them to magical places like Disney. I bet that’s an amazing feeling seeing their faces light up with joy and wonder. But see, that feeling would soon sour when we left them in the car with the window down whilst we went shrieking round the teacups. It’s just too much responsibility for a man for whom keeping a basil plant alive for two weeks is his crowning achievement in fatherhood.
Luckily, I have a nephew who I can deign to visit on occasion, and he’s really not bad for a mewling bespectacled hellion, though I’m reminded that I made the correct life choices within four minutes of being in his presence. If children came with an off button I’d be far more inclined to consider one, but the endless volume is really too much for my old ears.
Anyway. That’s quite enough chatter for now. Shall we get to the bacon and tomato rigatoni? We ought to: it’s really very good.
If you’re not a fan of bacon in the bacon and tomato rigatoni, swap it out for chorizo!
You can all sorts of vegetables into the bacon and tomato rigatoni, but this works jut fine as it is for Slimming World.
bacon and tomato rigatoni
Yield 4 servings
We seem to have hit a bit of a run with pasta recipes here at twochubbycubs but I shan't apologise for it. No no. See, quick meals you can throw together with whatever shite you have in the fridge is our raison d'être and frankly, this bacon and tomato rigatoni is very much one of those. We have, of course, tweaked it slightly for Slimming World. But damn does it taste good!
- 2 aubergines
- 1 medium onion
- 2 garlic cloves
- 300g plum tomatoes, halved
- 80g reduced fat feta cheese, crumbled (use your HEA!)
- 400g dried rigatoni
- 120g bacon medallions, diced
- 400g tin chopped tomatoes
- 1/2 tsp dried crushed chillis
- first, preheat your grill to high and bring a large pan of salted water to the boil
- as those are heating up, halve your aubergines lengthways, then slice slice each half into centimetre long strips, then slice the other way for cute little 1cm cubes
- spread the aubergine cubes out onto a baking sheet into a single layer and spray with a little oil, and sprinkle with a little bit of salt
- place under the grill and cook for about 10 minutes, then turn and cook for another ten minutes
- as that's going on, cook the pasta according to the instructions
- meanwhile, spray a large frying pan with a bit of oil and place over a high heat
- add the bacon and cook for 5-6 minutes, until crispy
- reduce the heat to medium high and add the onion, and cook until soft (about 4 minutes, stirring frequently)
- add the garlic and the chilli flakes to the pan, stir, and cook for another minute
- add the tin of chopped tomatoes and stir
- reduce the heat to medium and simmer for about 8 minutes, stirring occasionally
- once the aubergine is cooked, stir it into the pasta sauce
- meanwhile, place the cherry tomatoes onto the same tray you used for the aubergine, spray with a bit of oil, and crumble over the feta. Pop under the grill for 4-5 minutes
- when the pasta is cooked, drain and add to the tomato sauce with the grilled plum tomatoes, and stir
- serve to gasps of amazement
- diced aubergine really helps to pad this out and make it go further, and tastes bloody lovely
- you can swap out the bacon for chorizo if you like
- our slimming cookbook can be ordered online now – full of 100+ slimming recipes, and bloody amazing, with over 2400 5* reviews – even if we do say so ourselves: click here to order
- our new diet planner is out now and utterly brilliant – you can order it here – thank you to everyone so far for the positive feedback!
- nothing fancy needed for this recipe, but if you need some new lunchboxes for work, the SISTEMA ones we use are currently on sale at time of writing - click here!
Tasty stuff! Once you’ve had your fill of syn free bacon and tomato rigatoni, why not spin the wheel on our other pasta dishes? Here’s links to ten syn-free dishes!
- cheesy leek and bacon pasta bake (syn free)
- creamy chicken and vegetable soup (syn free)
- beef chilli and bean pasta bake (syn free)
- chicken chow mein (syn free)
- meatballs in a cheese sauce served in noodle nests (syn free)
- chicken, lemon and lentil one pot stew (syn free)
- mini lasagne cups (syn free)
- creamy garlic mushroom pasta (syn free)
- easy peasy spaghetti and meatballs (syn free)
- spaghetti with bacon, spring onion and peppers (syn free)