great song that, but not entirely descriptive of my garden, where the only thing that grows at the moment is a general feeling of disappointment and regret. However, we haven’t wasted the day, and spent most of the afternoon weeding and tidying up the back garden, which is, admittedly unusually, not a euphemism for anal sex.
Another simple recipe card this time:
This is great for a quick lunch!
to make simple spaghetti sauce you will need:
spaghetti, red peppers in a jar, bacon medallions, spring onions tomatoes, bit of parmesan, low low cheese spread, bit of mint, and yes, bloody fromage frais.
to make simple spagetti sauce you should:
grill the bacon, cook the spaghetti, chop the tomatoes, peppers and onion. Add 114g (that’s two HEAs, because this serves two) of low low to 100g of fromage frais. Microwave the chopped tomatoes and peppers so they’re hot. Mix the whole kit and kaboodle together. Top with parmesan and a tiny bit of mint. Syn the parmesan if you must. I’m renegade so don’t bother…
extra-easy: yup – one third is superfree (tomatoes, peppers, onion) so you’re fine, though maybe have a tangerine or something afterwards.
top tips:buy the peppers in brine in a jar – they’re already grilled, syn-free and tasty. Much cheaper than buying sweet peppers fresh and they can be added to anything!
Syn free this one, or maybe one syn if you’re anal. Hahaha, anal. Does anyone over the age of 18 not stop for a single beat whenever they type that word in its correct usage? Not only is it hilarious, it’s also delightfully smutty.
I have to say, for all the talk of Body Magic and moving our arses, Paul and I have done spectacularly little this weekend. No, really. I’m surprised I haven’t turned into one of those people who are grafted to their armchairs and have to have a group of men come in and wash me. Not that I’d turn my nose up at that. Our neighbours would love that. My mum once popped around in her police uniform (she’s a legit policewoman, not a stripper) and I’m not kidding, the sound of necks cracking as they craned round net curtains sounded like a giant rolling in bubble wrap.
Between Forza Horizon 2 and The Amazing Race, we’ve had very little reason to shift. Bowser seems reluctant to become a helping-cat, too, which doesn’t help. Our grand ideal of having the cat answer the phone, bring us the TV remote and cook us a three course meal seems entirely unreasonable to him. Anyway, short entry tonight as I’m off to work soon.
Tonight’s little recipe is what I suggestively call ‘Any Old Shite Superfree Quiche’ because frankly, that’s what I put in it.
I’m not sure we actually need a full recipe here – it’s all on the card. The only thing worth thinking about is synning the little bit of parmesan that I used, but it was such a small amount between four servings that I can’t be bothered. The rest is a case of chucking anything you have going spare / on the turn into a quiche tin, chopped up to reasonably similar sizes. Beat three eggs into 250g of fat-free cottage cheese, mix it all together, put in oven, and keep an eye on it. It might take a little longer as our oven is a fancypants one, but really you can tell when its cooked. Serve with a side salad or excellent for taking into work for lunch.
If I can give you any tips – adding a lot of tomatoes will make it quite wet
I realise that actually, our leftovers sound a bit lah-de-dah, but well, such is life. Our fridge has its own vodka shelf so that’s where we’re at.
If you’re a fan of dropping something you can’t pick up, or perhaps you like to lie in bed with your partner tormenting them by sounding the fanfare for the Brown King, or even if you’re a fan of air biscuits, this is the soup for you. You’ll be cutting the cheese in no time at all, and trouser coughs will resonate right through the house. You might even end up singeing your knickers with an inverted burp. Luckily, hopefully, you’ll be too busy exclaiming over your weight loss to complain about popping a fluffy.
FARTS
to make slimming world super speed soup:
This soup is so easy it doesn’t need a whole breakdown. The key is – stuff a load of superfree veg into a pan, top it up with stock, tin of tomatoes, baked beans, lentils, anything – cook it slowly and softly until everything is nicely cooked. Leave to cool and blend it in the Magimix or with a stick blender, but for heaven’s sake LET IT COOL first. Even if the top is cold, it’ll still be packing heat for ages.
I used all the veg I had sitting in the fridge, and it worked really well with a load of chilli added. It does make a genuinely nice soup and a lot of members swear by it. I’ve added it into my lunch this week, so we’ll see.
It is very, very filling and freezes well, too. We’re off to watch The Amazing Race, goodnight!
So, I put out a question onto a SW group on FB, which has been invaluable in providing tips, and the general consensus was that I should make a chutney. Someone very thoughtfully provided a recipe, so as one good turn deserves another, here is a recipe card:
to make onion jam:
Because I’m a bit prissy, I generally don’t like sweetener as it’s an awful amount of chemicals for nothing at all. Just use a bit of sugar or even better, honey. If you want to make it with sugar, add a good tablespoon and call it five syns, but sweetener will be free. Add to sterilised jars (dishwasher, highest temp, leave to air dry) and it’ll keep for a few days in the fridge. Perfect with meat!
Firstly, I apologise for not updating the blog last night but we were both stuck at work! Off to Fatfighters soon so only a very quick post but here is a recipe card for a good snack idea. I know I’ll be putting weight on because I have had too much crap this week thanks to being constantly at work. Sad times.
Paul is my superfree muffin! Enjoy, and I’ll check in later to confirm what damage I’ve done…muffins ahoy!
eight syns for the lot, but it’s worth noting that you can make this meal entirely syn-free by only having one burger and forgoing the condiments, but remember, you have syns – and what is life if you can’t syn it on a meal? I hardly drink anymore since turning a fetching yellow in college (a gentle mustard is how I’d describe myself) so I choose to use the syns on pepping up a meal every now and then.
Here’s the recipe, then:
these burgers are the shizzle though. We call them Geordie Boorgahs, because Paul finds my geordie accent hilarious, even though I’ve barely got one. Before he moved to Newcastle he thought everyone up here spoke like Byker Grove (pronounced By-ka Gruurve). I think he thinks I’m Burger Barry, as evidenced here on Harry Hill.
ingredients: lean mince, onion powder, salt and pepper, mixed herbs, garlic powder – you can chuck any old shite in really (really channeling that Nigella lexicography now) but that works for us, for the coleslaw it’s half a red cabbage, two carrots and a red onion, mixed with as much FAT-FREE fromage frais and lemon juice as you dare, and for the wedges just throw some sweet potato wedges into the Actifry of Wonder.
recipe for burgers:add meat mince to bowl with seasonings, blend by hand, mince by nature, shape into little burgers and stick them under the grill until they’re brown. open your buns, slap the meat in, add mustard and ketchup, we add tomato, onions, gherkins and rocket to ours and stick a wooden skewer through the lot to hold it together.
recipe for coleslaw: painstakingly shred your cabbage, carrot, onion and fingertips into a bowl, or cheat and use the grating function on your fancypants Magimix whilst mopping your brow and having a fit of the vapours. Add your wet ingredients, season to taste.
recipe for wedges: now come on.
extra-easy:yes – but be careful. We use our Healthy Extra A choice for the cheese (28g) across the two burgers and our healthy extra B for ONE breadbun. If you’re greedy like us, you’ll have two burgers, so you’ll need to syn your second bun – 6.5 syns. Add two syns for your condiments as long as you’re not someone who is common enough to drown your food in ketchup, and that comes to 8.5 syns for the meal. You could very easily have one bun, not bother with condiments and forgo the cheese, but I mean, haway. You could pull up the carpet and chew on that, but it doesn’t mean you should!
warning:careful with the mince. 5% fat or under is syn-free. You’ll find that extra lean mince has been phased out thanks to the Illuminati or something, so double check the fat content, because anything higher and the syn bounces right up!
top tips:you can really go to town with gussying these burgers up – why not add an egg (syn-free, fried in Frylight), or bacon (fat cut off, grilled), or a big old mushroom, or sliced peppers? In fact, the more you put onto the burger, the fuller you’ll be, so you might not NEED two burgers…
We’ve been weighed – I’m going to post the results when my new copy of Photoshop arrives and I can fanny about for an hour making a little picture. As you do.
Paul’s tomato pasta, of course, which is bursting at the seams with enough cherry tomatoes to pebbledash a small house with. an easy two syn recipe this – here’s the card:
ingredients:pack of bacon medallions (unsmoked), a veritable United Colours of Benetton range of tomatoes, two sweet peppers, sliced olives, two onions, oxo cube, any scratty bits of pasta you have left over, spinach and reduced fat feta to serve.
recipe: finely chop the onion, chilli, bacon and peppers and chuck them in a heavy pot with a lid to sweat down, then chop the various tomatoes to different sizes and add them to the mix. Simmer for a few minutes and add two tablespoons of tomato puree and 250ml of chicken stock. leave to simmer on a reasonable heat for twenty minutes or so. Cook and drain your pasta, and do it well for goodness sake as nobody likes watery pasta. tip into the tomato mix, shake it like a Polaroid picture and serve on a bed of spinach (another superfree) and top with reduced fat feta. Paul adds anchovies to his because he’s a sick, sick man.
extra-easy: perfect extra-easy meal, given the amount of tomatoes, peppers and onions in the pot which all count as superfree foods – you could always chuck in some peas or shredded leek.
warning: we used frylight, but if you use oil to fry, make sure you syn it. one teaspoon of olive oil is 2 syns – blimey. If you decide to use bacon as we have done, buy the medallions without fat or trim everything off. finally, olives – eight black olives are one syn altogether.
top tips:although Paul doesn’t trust me enough to do this yet, after eight years of marriage, you can just chuck your pasta straight into the sauce and cook it in the sauce rather than water. It’ll make the sauce thicker and it works a lot better with decent pasta, but it’s brilliant. Try it with spaghetti when you next make spaghetti bolognese.
